I walk on a road lush with dreams,
a road of forgotten and veiled dreams,
sometimes slowly, sometimes gaily,
sometimes lost, sometimes profound,
I walk a road of unknown mysteries,
fervently finding my way through the endless path.....

Friday, September 23, 2011


Taking hold of me
from dawn to dusk
and dusk to dawn
in blooms and flush

desires never die
unconsciously they lie
flourishing like weeds
causing untold miseries

spinning concentric webs
thread by thread
entangling and breaking, entangling again
futile is to impede

amorphous kindling aspirations
setting up wildly like a storm
rooting deep to the deepest
outgrowing the tallest of trees

I fight and I resist
those arrays of emotions
but there is no holding them
futile is to impede

neither meaningful words
nor soulful talks
can subdue those temptations
and futile is to impede....

Friday, September 16, 2011

Of 'BAI-S' and 'BYES' !!!

As I step into my house after a monotonous yet exhaustive day at college, my mother yells " you kids live in your own fantasy lands/nobody cares as to how the house is running/can't even pick up your own clothes/when I was of your age I took care of the whole house while my mother simply sat in a corner and instructed! Plus a special one specially thrown on me - what will you do in your sasural/get out of the illusion that your mom-in-law will cook for you!"
And the moment my ears vibrate to such a noise I instantly knows that 'our dear maid is on leave today'!!

In today's era when each one of us is so terribly bounded by time which ticks at a lightening speed, interdependency on 'helpers' comes natural. In fact they are our lifelines much the same way as Internet and cell phones. And going by the ever increasing demands our 'bai-s' happen to be one of the most dominating people of our society today. 

At times I seriously wonder if we medicos or engineers or bankers play a role as pivotal as these women clad in suits with a bun do?
And so our dear bai-s come up with their own set of demands and pay packages.
They need a holiday on a Sunday plus an additional off every two weeks never hurts HER (it does ruin my weekend though) when a shopping plan is murdered brutally as my mom drags me verbally to the kitchen!

Last week our bai turned up after a long 4 days holiday(it seems much longer to me for obvious reasons) and on being interrogated told that she had a marriage to attend tomorrow! Imagine being away from work 4 days prior to 'neighbour's marriage' sure you can't afford it even in your wildest dreams but she is our Bai. She definitely can!

To top it up the lady wanted a brand new sari, to which my mom agreed almost instantly (poor thing she got no choice) and I was red with rage. c'mon I wore an old sari even for my farewell, now isnt this pure bias?!

Not only this she comes every day to work with a fresh gajra in her bun teemed up with matching earrings and bags. Needless to say she has a cell phone too!

Coming to the resignation rules,our dear bai has none! I mean she can resign any day, any hour and at any instant. For reasons which vary from exceeding workload to bizarre ones of not being offered tea and snacks in the evening!
One of our neighbours maid quit the job because their little 4 year old kid spilled milk on her. I dearly sympathize with him going by the serious trauma that innocent soul would have faced from her mother after this lady left in cold blood.

Well ,enough of sulking now ( but believe me that sari thing really hurt). 
I am seriously planning to do some part time course in 'being-bai' because the future seems to be more secure and lavish with that degree now-a-days. And by the way, when I told my mom about this idea all she had to say was 'beta, today is a Sunday, go wash the utensils' !

P.S : Our maid owns a Nokia N-97! I am NOT exaggerating, I swear!  :P

Saturday, September 3, 2011

mystical dreams..... part -3

 "Its not just today
and never would a day come
when the world around
won't coerce me
that my existence is incomplete
without you besides me"

she whispered senselessly to her soul which appeared as insatiable as it had been years ago. 
yes! Many years had now passed but her relentless search only got deepened.
 Her friend had advised her to give it up and consult a psychiatrist however she knew well that no person by mere hallucinations or repressions could free her soul of it
A soul that was now completely drenched in that world of dreams. 
A soul that had now tasted the bitter sweet demeanour of forbidden magic.
she was totally possessed in it, of it and for it!! there was no way out except to wade in further.

This was NOT love, it had transformed into a limbo or maybe a state of trance which continued to get unquenchable each passing second.
she had left her job long back, her own house, family, belongings, whatever that belonged to her and to where she belonged was now simply a state...a state of nothingness and timelessness.

"the dawn is not distance, nor is the night starless;love is eternal".

she again murmured to herself trudging through by the glint of the night.

suddenly as if the whole words bedazzled or struck by lightening...she saw his face! 
It was really him standing on the other side of the road!
That same tall attractive gentleman dressed in a glossy black suit teamed with a navy blue tie..the same man who had stolen all her dreams to make them his own, that same man who dictated her entire being for years now!

She felt herself en captured by a divine spell in those long seconds, the world had widened much beyond horizons or was it shrinking onto hers?
There was pain , fright, desire, anger, impatience, irritation, excitement, pleasure all at once in her soul.
her quest had reached its brim and emotions ran like wild horses..'a few steps more and it will all be hers..this mystery would no longer haunt her soul' she thought.
He stood still at the opposite side staring at her even now.

1...2...3...she had galloped to the other side at an impulse!


Her eyes open, where is she? At the middle of a road it seems!
She can feel something is wrong with her, her blood seems to ooze out slowly but there is no pain.
She lies there numb and dizzy but there was no desire to get away. Being completely aware of her fate and also the fate of the man beside her in deep slumber some distance away.
she looked at him..but alas! He is NOT there...she can now see him EVERYWHERE! all around, in all direction, at all ends!
she dare not close her this an illusion? no it cant be!

Now he is beside her again, a faint smile lits her face as she finally closes her eyes. forever this time.
No more mirages.
No more mysteries.
Just the mystical kingdom of her dreams.

Illusions have accepted her soul in their world...realities could wait for another life now.

Hub( attraction) and Maut(Death) are but shades of an eternal journey called love!

xxx THE END xxx 


Ancient Arabic Literature says that there are Seven Shades of Love - 1. Hub (Attraction), 2. Uns (Infatuation), 3. Ishq (Love), 4.Aquidat (Reverence), 5. Ibadat (Worship), 6. Junoon (Obsession) and 7. Maut (Death) [ Read it as a friend's status on Facebook ]

Thanks to one of my sweetest friend in blog-o-sphere Sadiya Merchant for giving me the inspiration and much needed motivation to pen up something which was very close to my heart yet I had no idea how to put it up in words :-)