I walk on a road lush with dreams,
a road of forgotten and veiled dreams,
sometimes slowly, sometimes gaily,
sometimes lost, sometimes profound,
I walk a road of unknown mysteries,
fervently finding my way through the endless path.....

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

The price of love.

I have been in love with him since ages, for each time he leaves me in solitude I live a hundred years each day and uncountable memories each night.
They say, every sunset brings a new light but for me, its just another hundred years to survive before a blanket of memories- his memories, our memories traps my soul.

An irony it is! The world moves on so smoothly, unperturbed and nonchalant, while your own life suffocates and breaks every second.
The wind blows at the same pace, people laugh and love, clock ticks, trees grow and hearts beats but for me, my little world exists within. Surrounded by his memory. The words he said, those smiles we shared and an immense pain his absence has bestowed on me.

For some days, there is just numbness and coldness. Frozen and still inner self. And suddenly the volcano erupts! Too strong to be overpowered by a fragile heart. My fragile heart, on which you poked your hurts night and day, consistently and lasting forever...

No matter how hard I try to ventilate my mind, opening the windows of thoughts and emotions for other things, things that mattered and reflected concern once but are now opaque and nonchalant of even themselves. You, precisely anything and everything that has an essence of you, only has the power to hit me, shake me, wake me!

How and when in this saga of my existence did 'you' become such an omnipresent and imposing part? That little by little I see bits of my own self crumbling, shying and dying out and away.
Tired of waiting for you. Too exhausted to fight. Too meager to exist. 
Is this the reason why they call love so overpowering? I am not sure but this reason seems to be true.

I have been over shadowed by this giant called love who gripped me in his comforting hands taking me to the top of the world, high and higher till everything around became far and misty except a gush of cool air and the euphoria of being among the stars. And suddenly, this giant dropped me! Yes, he dropped me and I hit the floor lifeless. My heart lay bleeding, eyes moist , mind so confused and chaotic while my soul almost succumbed to irreparable damage. They were right when they said that 'its not the fall that hurts but its that sudden stop in the end'.
This sudden inevitable stop.
This piercing realization that neither the sky could save me nor did the ground.
And even when I lay on the kiss the floor thrashed like an insect, the giant still over shadows me.

Everything comes with a price. But the price of falling amidst this euphoria called love can't be paid off by mere mortals like me. Not in an entire life. He was right when he said 'love is priceless'. Indeed it is.

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